November 1st, 2008 by MySpace Bulletins

Men:
1) 94% of men lie about their penis size.
According to condom manufacturers, only 6% of
men use extra large condoms.

2) The average man is 5 inches long when erect
(no matter what you have heard ladies, that’s the
truth).

3) 80% of American men are circumsized. Even
though Pediatrics say it is not necessary.

4) No matter what all the ads say, nothing can
make your penis grow but time (most men reach
the end of their growth by the early 20’s)

5) There is no correlation between penis size and
shoe size, hand size, or nose size.

6) Blue balls does exist! It’s technically
called “prostatic congestion.”

7) Only 16% of men shave their privates.

+Some stuff on the ladies+
——————————

1) Only 9% of women around the globe consider
themselves “attractive” (20% of British women
do).
43% of women use the term “natural”, 24% say
they have “average” looks, 8% prefer the
term “feminine”, 7% say they are “good looking”,
and 7% say they are “cute”, and finally only 2% of
women say they are “sexy”.

2) An estimated 85% of women wear the wrong
size bra.
3) 60% of women have had breast implants.
4) 75% of women dont like oral sex
5) 95% of women shave their privates.

+Both+
——————————–
1) Masturbation is healthy for both men and
women.

2) 70% of highschoolers have had sex before
they have graduated. 27% loose their virginity senior
prom night. Only 3% wait until marriage.

3) 95% of men would have sex with a girl after 1
month of dating. Only 10% of women feel this way.

+5 Reasons Why Sex is Good+
———————————————
1) It is a good workout. Sex burns about 150
calories every half an hour of it. It will lower your
cholesterol and improve breathing circulation.

2) You won’t get sick. According to research if
you have sex 1-2 times a week you are less likely to
get sick.

3) You’ll feel happier. You will feel a greater sense
of well-being. Women who have more sex were
clinically proven to be less depressed than women
who dont have sex.

4) Makes you look better – [ problem is, ugly people
don`t get any ]. Sex releases hormones in you which make your skin and hair softer and shinier and tone your physique.

5) (The best reason) You will live longer. Studies
prove that sex makes you live longer. Men who
had sex 1-2 times a week had half the death rate
as those who did not indulge themselves at least
once a month. It also makes you look younger. If
you have sex 3 times a week you may look up to
10 years younger than you really are.

Did You Know?
—————————————-
1) Having sex 3 times a week for 1 year adds up
to running 75 miles!!!!

If you don’t post this then you will have bad sex
for 7 years (who wants that?)

November 1st, 2008 by MySpace Bulletins

COMPANY STATS

This is frightening! Can you imagine working for a company that has a

little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics:

*29 have been accused of spousal abuse *7 have been arrested for fraud *19

have been accused of writing bad checks *117 have directly or indirectly

bankrupted at least 2 businesses *3 have done time for assault *71 cannot

get a credit card due to bad credit *14 have been arrested on drug-related

charges *8 have been arrested for shoplifting *21 are currently defendants

in lawsuits *84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year

Can you guess which organization this is? Give up yet?

It’s the 535 members of the United States Congress. The same group that

crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us

in line.

October 31st, 2008 by MySpace Bulletins

Your alarm goes off, you hit the snooze and sleep for another 10 minutes.

He stays up for days on end.
__________________________

You take a warm shower to help you wake up.

He goes days or weeks without running water.
__________________________

You complain of a “headache”, and call in sick.

He gets shot at, as others are hit, and keeps moving forward.
__________________________

You put on your anti war/don’t support the troops shirt, and go meet up with your friends.

He still fights for your right to wear that shirt.
__________________________

You make sure you’re cell phone is in your pocket.

He clutches the cross hanging on his chain next to his dog tags.
__________________________

You talk trash on your “buddies” that aren’t with you.

He knows he may not see some of his buddies again.
__________________________

You don’t feel like helping out your dad today, so you don’t.

He does what he is told.
__________________________

You walk down the beach, staring at all the pretty girls.

He walks the streets, searching for insurgents and terrorists.
__________________________

You complain about how hot it is.

He wears his heavy gear, not daring to take off his helmet to wipe his brow.
__________________________

You go out to lunch, and complain because the restaurant got your order wrong.

He does not get to eat today.
__________________________

Your maid makes your bed and washes your clothes.

He wears the same things for months, but makes sure his weapons are clean.
__________________________

You go to the mall and get your hair redone.

He doesn’t have time to brush his teeth today.
__________________________

You are angry because your class ran 5 minutes over.

He is told he will be held an extra 2 months.

He does as he is told.
__________________________

You call your girlfriend and set a date for that night.

He waits for the mail to see if there is a letter from home.
__________________________

You hug and kiss your girlfriend, like you do everyday.

He holds his letter close and smells his love’s perfume.
__________________________

You ditch class to go to a movie.

He goes where he is told.
__________________________

You roll your eyes as a baby cries.

He gets a letter with pictures of his new child, and wonders if they’ll ever meet.
__________________________

You criticize your government, and say that war never solves anything.

He sees the innocent tortured and killed by their own government and remembers why he is fighting.
__________________________

You hear the jokes about the war, and make fun of the men like him.

He hears the gun fire and bombs.
__________________________

You see only what the media wants you to see.

He sees the bodies lying around him.
__________________________

You are asked to go to the store by your parents. You don’t.

He does what he is told.
__________________________

You stay at home and watch tv.

He takes whatever time he is given to call and write home, sleep, and eat.
__________________________

You crawl into your bed, with down pillows, and try to get comfortable.

He crawls under a tank for shade and a 5 minute nap, only to be woken by gun fire.
__________________________

You sit there and judge him, saying the world is a worse place because of men like him.

If only there were more men like him

PLEASE REPOST!! OUR HUSBANDS/WIVES, SONS/DAUGHTERS, COUSINS, FRIENDS ARE OUT THERE FIGHTING AND RISKING THEIR LIVES FOR US!! PLEASE SUPPORT OUR TROOPS!!

October 31st, 2008 by MySpace Bulletins

Ok here are 20 tips on what TO do and what NOT to do on myspace…….

1. Posting several bulletins in a row is lame, and means you are pathetic and have no life! A fe bulletins back to back or acceptable.

2. The pics of you in your bathroom with your cell……are boring! And if you have 3 or more pics of you in the same position, posing a “little” bit differently, that’s stupid too!

3. If you don’t know how to post a bulletin, JUST ASK! It get’s old when you hit the reply button when it says RE-POST!
If you do it more then twice, it’s not an accident anymore….it’s annoying, and so are you.

4. Your true love is not gonna call you at midnight, you wont fall in love through myspace within 3 minutes if you re-post any bulletin.

5. Your NOT gonna die if you don’t re-post.

6. Tom will never shut your myspace account down, unless you post nude pics, or threatening messages.

7. Don’t flash gang signs in your pics, your not a “gangsta” gangsters don’t even use myspace.

8. Myspace is not a popularity contest, so don’t add people you don’t know just to have a billion friends.

9. You will never be like Tom.

10. If your some fat ugly girl, don’t use a name like “Sexy Goddess” cause your not.

11. If someone sends you a comment, don’t be an ass and send them a message, send them a comment back!

12. Comments are for fun, talking about how your week was, what your doing for the weekend, don’t spill your personal life to your friends through comments, EVERYONE can see them.

13. For all the people who deny other people through friend requests……they know you did.

14. In your “sent” mail, you can tell when someone has read your messages and wont write you back, forget em,

15. Having more celebrities for friends, then actual friends…isn’t cool…it makes you look like a loser!

16. Try not to send personal messages after midnight, when the person who you sent it to wakes up in the morning and reads it……most likely they’re gonna think you were wasted.

17. Whoever sends out the bulletin announcing their profile views, and then trying to get everyone to get on it too….is a complete loser! We don’t care about your profile views, we see it all the time on musicians, and celebs profiles.

18. Chain letters are such a waste of time, a work day, and life!

19. Don’t add someone as a friend and then delete them…..you had that chance to think about it when they popped up in your friend request section!

October 31st, 2008 by MySpace Bulletins

Crazy ass facts about liquor and the law!
Body: It’s The Law!
After Michael O’Neil opened O’Neil’s Saloon, he was promptly informed by the state liquor authority that he was breaking the law by using the word “saloon.” He complied by changing the “S” into a “B,” thus making it O’Neil’s Baloon. 1

Although the French wine, “Fat Bastard,” is now distributed in 22 states in the US. both Texas and Ohio have banned its sale within their borders. 2

The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms (BAFT) bans the word “refreshing” to describe any alcohol beverage. 3

A young adult college student studying in Italy can’t have a glass of Chianti with dinner, according to the Drug Free Schools and Campuses Act. Students under the age of 21 are prohibited by the federal government from conforming to the drinking laws and customs of the countries in which they are studying. This, of course, is contrary to the educational goals underlying international education or study abroad programs. 4

It is a violation of the California Alcoholic Beverage Control Act for producers of alcohol beverages to list the names of retailers or restaurants that sell their products in advertising or even in newsletters. 5

A person can be sent to jail for five years for merely sending a bottle of beer, wine or spirits as a gift to a friend in Kentucky. 6

Maryland now requires that alcohol beverage writers be certified as experts by an agency of the state before they can receive product samples, which it limits to three bottles per brand. 7

Anyone under the age of 21 who takes out household trash containing even a single empty alcohol beverage container can be charged with illegal possession of alcohol in Missouri. 8

If a law enforcement officer is having a drink in a bar in Iowa and an employee pours water down the drain, the water is legally considered an alcohol beverage intended for unlawful purposes. 9

Don’t plan on running a “tab” in Iowa; it’s illegal. 10

Druggists in Connecticut must pay $400.00 each year for a license in order to use alcohol in compounding prescriptions. 11

No alcohol beverages can be displayed within five feet of a cash register of any store in California that sells both alcohol and motor fuel. 12

It’s illegal in Michigan for a person under the age of 21 to give a gift of alcohol beverage to anyone, even to a person of legal age. 13

A server in California can be convicted of selling to a minor if the purchaser uses a false or altered ID to buy the alcohol. 14

An owner or employee of an establishment in Iowa that sells alcohol can’t legally consume a drink there after closing for business. 15

Public intoxication is a crime in Pennsylvania but specifically not a crime in Minnesota. 16

It’s illegal in New Jersey for parents to give their children under the age of 18 even a sip of alcohol. 17

Permitting diners to take home an unfinished bottle of alcohol beverage, rather than consuming it all before leaving to prevent “waste,” encourages moderation and discourages intoxication. However, this is prohibited in Michigan. 18

The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a recipe for making beer that can be used at home. 19

It’s illegal in Indiana for liquor stores to sell milk or cold soft drinks. They can, however, sell uinrefrigerated soft drinks. 20

Texas state law prohibits taking more than three sips of beer at a time while standing. 21

Nebraska state law prohibits bars from selling beer unless they are simultaneously brewing a kettle of soup. 22

State law of North Dakota prohibits serving beer and pretzels at the same time in any bar or restaurant. 23

In Houston, Texas, beer many not be purchased after midnight on Sunday, but can be purchased anytime on Monday…which happens to begin right after midnight on Sunday! So it’s illegal to buy it when its legal to buy it? 24

Law Breaker?
Mark Phillips of Alexandria, Virginia, was arrested for selling a single bottle of Chateau Lafite Rothschild wine to an undercover agent in an Alcohol Beverage Control (ABC) board sting.

Phillips, as leader of a local wine club had agreed to post the offer on the club’s web site on behalf of a member of the diplomatic service who needed to dispose of that bottle and a few others in preparation for an overseas tour of duty for the United States.

In making the arrest, ABC appeared at Phillips’ house with a dozen armed officers and held the accused and his family under guard while officers searched the house. They threatened to confiscate Phillips’ entire personal wine collection, not just the few bottles he offered for sale on behalf of a friend.

The case was dismissed on a technicality, but had Phillips been convicted of selling alcohol without a liscence, he could have faced one year in jail and a $2,500 fine. 25

Colorado law requires that wine be sold in containers of at least 24 ounces and spirits in containers at least a fifth of a gallon. But, at the same time, it also decrees that no alcohol beverage can be stored in hotel minibars in anything larger than miniature containers. 26

If you are intoxicated but not driving your car, but the person who is driving your car is intoxicated, both you and the driver can be charged with DUI (driving under the influence of alcohol) in Virginia Beach, Virginia. 27

Don’t plan on using any of the celebratory Champagne bottle sizes known as Methuselahs, Salamanazars, Balthazars or Nebuchadnezzars. These very traditional Champagne bottle sizes are all illegal in Florida. 28

Some states and other jurisdictions within the US require that the interior of public drinking establishments be visible from the street, whereas other specifically prohibit that; some insist that food be available wherever drinks are served, whereas other make that illegal; and some require that anyone drinking stand at a bar, whereas others mandate that they be seated while drinking. 29

Ohio state law prohibits getting a fish drunk. 30

In Fairbanks, Alaska, it’s illegal to feed a moose any alcohol beverage. 31

It’s illegal to sit on any street curb in St. Louis, Missouri, and drink beer from a bucket. 32

Drunk drivers in San Salvador can be punished by death before a firing squad. 33

In Saskatchewan, Canada, it’s illegal to drink alcohol while watching exotic dancers. 34

In the 1940’s, California law made it illegal to serve alcohol to a gay (homosexual) person. 35